Maybelle’s Astro Illogical Readings, don’tcha know

Ya know, back when I was a youngin,  Auntie Fester use-ta tell me what was what by where the stars were sittin.  And I don’t mean the stars in movies and the like.  I mean the ones in the sky at Lake WhaddyathinkImean. You see, Auntie Fester was fascinatin bout astro-illology. She’d measure my head and say it was big cause I was fulla ideas, bein a Geminina and all. That’s the astro-illogical sign I was born under, don’tcha know. She even said one day Maybelle, yer gonna be talkin up a storm to folks who can’t even see ya. And Auntie Fester was right. Turns out I’m talkin to hunreds of folks on my radio show.

Whatcha probly don’t know is, Auntie Fester taught me all about astro-illology and now I’m givin readings too. Like today, bein the middle of March and all, I can surely tell ya if yer a Pie-Seeun, get ready to have the elevator in yer buildin fixed or yer pie won’t rise. That’s cause Yerannus is swirling round Murkery. On the other hand, if yer a SaggingTarius, chin-ups should do it. And if you think astro-illology is fer the birds…you’d be right. Robins and Canada geese are specially partial to readin horror scopes in papers left on park benches.

And remember … behind those rain clouds, the sun is always shinin, and if you can’t see it…you just shine in its place. Nightie night. M


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4 responses to “Maybelle’s Astro Illogical Readings, don’tcha know

  1. M.I. Confused

    Hi Maybelle;
    Been readin yer blog and blogerithms, I mean Astro Illogical sign language. I was wonderin what’s in store fer us Leons ? Yah I know we get a year before we have to pay fer our furnicher, but everybody gets that I unnerstand. So what can us Leons expect fer the next liddle while? By the way, was it you or was it yer mother Maybelline who invented the stuf wimmen put into ther eyelashes? Jes wonderin.
    A Big Fan,

    • Hi M.I., Oh you Leons are in fer some star-rattlin’ good times. Make sure to hang on to your all-togethers ’cause you’ll be flyin’ like a goose in a turbine. As fer my mother Maybelline, she weren’t inta the eyelash goo, but she did take ta breakin’ egg yolks on her face fer the protein, don’tcha know.

  2. Bonnie

    Hey Maybelle!

    Still LOVIN your show….keep up the good work and spreadin those chuckles around the way only you can!

    love ‘n big hugs,
    Bonnie ox

    • Oh Bonnie, you make my ‘ol heart do the New York shuffle. Big thank yous from all of us here at Lake WhaddyathinkImean fer listenin’ to our show and smilin’ at us in yer emails! Love right back atcha …

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