Hello everybody out there in Cyberia-space. This is Maybelle Morton bloggin’ to ya all the way from Californi-a. Lost Angeles, don’tcha know. That’s right. I came here all the way from Lake WhaddyathinkImean for a big bash of a weddin’ celebration, and a bit of sunshine to boot.
And what a site. Green green green and more green. And that’s just people’s faces. Just kiddin. The palm trees, the orange blossoms, and 70 degrees weather in February. And folks still sayin there’s no such thing as global warming. Like what planet are they living on?
Walkin around without a winter coat and boots is heaven. And all the shops and restaurants and billboards. Makes Lake WhaddyathinkImean’s two block downtown look like the underbelly of a gnat.
Then they got plastic surgeon police every two blocks insistin that you have Botox or Restylin or some skin smoothin’ treatment or go back to Kettle Creek where you belong. Harumph! Can’t figure why lookin old’s got people in a stitch. I say, smooth yer attitude and it won’t matter what you look like. Further more, you won’t care.
And speakin’ of attitude. Ever since the underpants bomber screwed up last December, airport security has got perdy darn silly. FOUR check points before ya even get to yer gate. Ya kn-ow, I wouldn’ta minded it so much but some of the security folks workin at Pearson airport should have their ATTITUDES checked. Mean-spirited, rude, intimidating. And my question is: WHY????? Isn’t flyin stressful enough without havin people bully you?
And you know you better not give em yer mind cause they’re just lookin fer an excuse to use their new-found power to ruin yer day. I’m not even Jewish, but I say: OY VEY!!!
Nevermind, my old friend, Clara Fitzblintzbaum, picked me up at the airport and before I knew it, I fergot all about the airport bullies. We gabbed all the way to Beverly Hills and Clara’s big house on a hill across from where Fred Astaire and Mary Pickfair use ta live. Then she pulled out this small contrapulation and clicked the thing and boy, these big ol iron gates in her driveway opened up. I ain’t seen nothin’ like that in Lake WhaddyathinkImean, don’tcha know.
Did I tell ya I’m not havin to wear a parka or boots and a hat, long johns and flannel undies? I feel ten pounds lighter, younger, healthier and I know that’s gonna change soon. Yea.
When I start eatin Mexican food again, my favorite which you can’t find anywheres near Lake W. Tacos, enchiladas, tostadas, on and on. Tamarra I’m goin’ with Claire to see Avatar. She said to bring tissue to clean off the 3-D glasses.
Well, my eyes are closin’. I’m still gettin used ta the time change. Be well, fellow cyber-spacers, and remember … behind those rain clouds the sun is always shinin’, and if you can’t see it, then you just shine in its place.
Nighty night. Maybelle
Comedy: Maybelle's Fireside Stories 